Post-divorce school?

From the New York Times:

Cleansing the Toxins of Divorce

In Santa Monica, Calif., a land that reveres both self-reflection and serious rehab, helping people to view divorce as a good thing.    For full article, cut & paste the link: http://nyti.ms/UtrgBJ

 

 

Family Court Wizard

There are lots of online programs for divorced parents to use to ease communication, but the one that is getting the best reviews and is the most comprehensive is “Our Family Wizard.”   If a client has difficulty communicating with other parent,  Our Family Wizard is phenomenal in aiding communication and providing a reliable record, which can be used in later Court proceedings, if necessary.  The program has the typical online calendar, but it can also be used for email , tracking who said what when (in a clean format, instead of 20 page string emails), text tracking, and third parties can be given permission to review the parents communication and calendars – permission must be given by both parents.  The FCW can facilitate  expense reimbursements; online payments can be made by the owing parent,  and the FCW has private or shared journaling capabilities.   I think  it’s worth taking a look to see if use of Our Family Wizard can help make your dealings with the other parent easier.  And, of course, there is an Android and iPhone app.

Mediation

Another post about mediation, probably becauseI am so enamored of it.  In Maricopa County, divorcing parties are requried to attend what is called “ADR” or Alternative Dispute Resolution, before they go to a final trial.  This is a free service offered by the Court.  The problem with the free ADR offered by the Court is that the mediator is only required to set the ADR for three hours.  Unfortunately, most cases cannot be resolved in that short of a period of time.  After years and years of mediation (about twenty to be exact), I find that the momentum to settle builds after the 4th or 5th hour.  The first hours are usually spent exploring issues and airing grievances; once the parties feel they have been “heard,” they are much more likely to reach a mediated agreement.  Divorce is an emotional process that requires time, even in mediation.  What I have been doing lately is asking the free ADR mediator appointed in a specific case to “go on the clock” at the conclusion of the free mediation period, if we are making progress.  My clients save money, they have received the first hours of mediation for free, and they get the time needed to fully settle their case.

What to Expect When It Comes To Spousal Maintenance

by Elizabeth Feldman

Spousal maintenance, or what use to be called “alimony,” is one of the hottest topics in family law these days.  Often one of the first concerns a spouse has when considering a divorce is whether they will receive or pay spousal maintenance and why; how much they will have to pay or receive, and for how long.  Unfortunately, there is no easy answer to this question, and there is no quick calculation.

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The Time and Place for No Fault Divorce

by Elizabeth Feldman

If you are thinking about getting a divorce (or separation), or are in the midst of divorce litigation, you will hear (maybe all too often) that Arizona is a “no fault” state.   What this means is that neither party has to prove that the other party is “at fault” in order to get a divorce.  In other words, if you or your partner wants a divorce, you get divorced.  It doesn’t matter if he/she is a dirty, rotten, mean, cheating scoundrel.  And usually a court won’t even be interested in any of the juicier details.

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Mediation, is it for you?

written by Sandra Burt

The answer to the title question is an emphatic YES!

Mediating your divorce or even problems you are having after a divorce is a great and less expensive way to resolve disputes. If you have the right type of mediation, then mediating your dispute does not mean you will be giving up any rights you have or compromising on your end result.

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Good People in Bad Times? Good People At Their Worst!

In family law we often refer to the two parties as “good people at their worst”. Divorce is one of the most emotional of court proceedings.  It’s not just about money or property, it is about love gone awry (or gone away), and about the loss of your hopes and dreams for the future.  One of the easiest ways to deal with this is to turn your spouse into a bad guy: to remember only the bad times you’ve had with your spouse and his or her family,  to think only about the bad  characteristics and habits – all of the aggravating and annoying things you’ve endured  throughout your marriage.

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Why Do I Have To Pay Child Support Through The Clearinghouse?

By Sandra Burt

My clients often ask me why they have to pay through the clearinghouse. “Isn’t that an extra step between the money and the children?”  As you may or may not know, all child support (and sometimes spousal maintenance) payments go through the Department of Economic Security Clearinghouse.

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What to Do About Holiday Nightmares

I wrote earlier this week about how the holidays are a time of warmth, family and togetherness… but that warmth, family and togetherness is not always so easy to come by.  Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa and the winter break including Christmas and the New Year all seem to flow together and create high levels of stress.  It is especially acute when you have children who split holidays between mom and dad.  It is a busy time for Family lawyers.

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Giving Thanks

By Sandy Bregman

During this Thanksgiving holiday, as I took the time to slow down, spend time with my wonderful family, and give thanks for those people and things for which I am most grateful, one of the things that was foremost in my mind was you–my clients, colleagues, and loyal readers.  I would like to take this opportunity to thank all of you who read this blog, come into our office, and support us in so many different ways for the time you have spent with us, the trust you have put in us, and the role you have let our firm play in your lives. It gives us great pleasure to know that we are helping families—young or old, large or small—deal with some of the most difficult and emotional parts of their lives.

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